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Yea but i think while you should definitely tell your girlfriend about it if you have one. most people should not know about it or only mention it if they mention kinks too. since i noticed most people think it's weird. and I used to think we were past the era were this mattered but a lot of people are becoming more prudish and are becoming against fetishes too .
unlike some people on this site i am into more violent fantasy content that people may have bigger moral issues with .but i can separate fantasy from reality
Is there a reason to keep it a secret that I find muscularity attractive on a woman? Of course not. Is there a reason to keep it a secret that I've spent thousands of dollars worshipping the physiques of roided-up female bodybuilders in hotel rooms as my knees quaver for an hour at a time? Yes, probably.
Everything you said is accurate.
There are so many layers to this, though. On the one hand, so many people have some form of Main Character Syndrome and think "people" give a shit about what they're into. And then on the other, a lot of the arousal actually stems from the taboo nature of the topic. Some of the titillation essentially requires some degree of shame about it.
I don't tell anyone I like muscular girls. It's something most people don't understand and are repulsed by I think. Probably about 80% of people don't think women should look muscular. I know people will look weirdly at me if I admitted to that. If I was ever able to get a muscular girlfriend I wouldn't care and would show her off proudly but that's never gonna happen. I think that probably the gym people would be some of the only people you could feel comfortable telling, or anybody you know who is into fitness. It also depends on how much muscle you like on a woman.
Yeah, I agree on one point. Liking muscular women is pretty vanilla as far as fetishes go. I personally have a broad taste in the kind and amount of muscles I like - from petite girls like Vanessa Serros to wellness girls to "mass monsters" like Natalia Kuznetsova.
But there is a reason why some of us fear exposure. Some of us grew up in a closed and sex-negative environment where we didn't have the liberty to express our true desires and opinions. Even once a person exits such an environment it's difficult to deprogram yourself from its effects on your personality..
I'll admit I'm not a particularly beefy dude. I'm average looking. So I feel like if I openly admitted what kind of women I actually like I would be judged for it. I want to avoid having people talk behind my back or judging me for whom I like. It probably wouldn't be that big of a deal if I was a bodybuilder myself or some other type of strength athlete. People would probably go "Yeah, makes sense for the guy to like chicks in his sport."
Sometimes if I feel the need to be more open with a person I might bring up some soft cues, e.g. "I'm a calves guy" or "I wouldn't mind if a girl had bigger arms than me". Projecting a laid back persona haha.
So it's not really a deep dark secret, but I sympathize with the folk who don't feel comfortable talking about their liking for muscles with other people irl.
Sometimes my friends and I like to chat about women and when we're watching TV they will ask me if I fancy any women on there. I had to say "no" to them multiple times and each time they would act shocked for some reason. But the real reason is that many of these women are simply not my type. So I guess in this case telling them the truth would spare me from further annoying questions like that.
As for whether I would tell my GF, well, it depends on her personality. I would probably first try to test the waters with a light hearted joke or give her a socially acceptable compliment (e.g. for her calves), and then if she reacts positively I would hopefully do something with it. Because one time a female friend of mine was joking about how she's going to get buff and beat me up lol. And I acted nonchalant even in that moment.
I think all this talk of revealing secrets is meaningless behind screen names. I suggest we all put money where our mouths are and out ourselves by beginning your next post with:
Name
Address
Birthdate
City/state/Provence of Birth
Any type of national identifier number
I think all this talk of revealing secrets is meaningless behind screen names. I suggest we all put money where our mouths are and out ourselves by beginning your next post with:
Name
Address
Birthdate
City/state/Provence of Birth
Any type of national identifier number
I just loved the irony here. The hypocrisy of whoever created this thread ends perfectly with the joke suggested in this comment.
Awhile ago, I ran across a post that had this bit of text on his significant other finding out he goes on GWM, and I inspired me to write this post:
ive kept the fact that I like Jacked up girls a secret since I was like 16, I didn't think anybody would know and I feel like my secret has been exposed
Which leads me to ask: why? And this person isn't the only one to have written something like this. Why do so many people (here and outside of the forum) treat their interest in buff women like some dark secret? It's a preference, just like anything else when it comes to attraction. And when you look into the broader kink/fetish world, liking buff women is so very vanilla and unremarkable compared to some of the things I have seen people into.
Also, I have said this before but it bears repeating: People (strangers) care a lot less about you than you think. Even if you wore a shirt in a tourist area that says "I dig women built like Anastasia Korableva!," and on the shirt there is a picture of her in a bikini, I guarantee you that they might take a brief glance and right after go about their day. And if your friends give you grief or make fun of you (outside of friendly ribbing,) then they're not really your friends.
If anything, the insecurity of liking buff women and the desire to keep it secret is a lot more glaring and obvious than actually being into muscular women. No, you shouldn't shoehorn your love for buff women and other fetishes related to it when hanging out with your friends or whatever, but also don't go out of your way to keep it a buried secret.
And finally, look at all the dudes (and women!) who are dating and in relationships with a muscular women. Do any of them look embarrassed or sheepish to be with a buff partner? They ALL look proud and happy.
Seriously. If you are keeping this such a deep secret, ask yourself why. From a muscular woman fan to another, please don't be insecure about that.
Long time ago I got to attend a taping of Mad TV and met Alex Borstein (best known now as the voice of Lois Griffin). I actually was wearing a similar t-shirt to what you described. Alex glared at me and said "She... look-a like a man!"
I never got over that and haven't ever told anyone since. Not even anonymously on the Internet.
Also, all that was little more than a corny Miss Swan reference.
Telling/not telling people doesn't necessitate any relation to muscular women in particular. Who and what people like is their business alone.
I fall into the "Don't kiss and tell category". I'm simply a private person and don't feel compelled to discuss past relationships. Only one member on this website (that I'm aware of) is privy to such knowledge, but I've considered him a friend for a very long time.
Everyone on this website is announcing their mutual interest by vitue of being a user. Those times I've been in a relationship with a muscular woman, it doesn't need to be said to onlookers when we're strolling through a park or enjoying a night out at a restaurant.
See, just as you're perplexed by people like John being reserved, I'm perplexed why it matters to you that he's walking his own path. That's his comfort level.
In my less than secure youth I'd have possibly made some excuses, but since my late 20's I have a pretty low opinion of guys who are attracted to petite/non-built women (and yes some of them are very pretty, but need to hit the weights), and I have no problem saying, "Nahhh, too much of a stick/too short/I like curves" etc.
So the guys who are deterred by muscle gals - well, that's probably a mental issue. And how they take that, is NOT my problem.
:)
Long time ago I got to attend a taping of Mad TV and met Alex Borstein (best known now as the voice of Lois Griffin). I actually was wearing a similar t-shirt to what you described. Alex glared at me and said "She... look-a like a man!"
Lol, what shirt was that?
Im pretty sure the main reason why guys want to hide their attraction to specifically muscular women (as opposed to just any attractive woman that is not your girlfriend/wife) is simple and obvious: "People think muscular women look like men therefore people will think Im Gay". Whether thats a real problem or a realistic fear is another question.
I don't think of my attraction to muscular women as a secret or something to hide. I'm pretty open about it with people.
Some people are cool with it, others more judgemental, but that's on them.
As an example, just the other day I was at the bus stop and I leaned over to a middle aged woman sitting next to me and said "Hello. I find muscular women extremely attractive" and she literally just got up and left the stop. Totally judgemental. Society isn't ready for it in some cases.
The worst I ever had was at the local municipal swimming pool. I was in the shallow end and I paddled over to a couple of what I'd guess were college aged women and casually said "There's nothing WRONG with finding muscular women attractive! I certainly do." but they were so stuck in the societal paradigm of stereotypical gender appearance that they had the lifeguards throw me out.
Similar experience in the showers at the gym. Guy washing next to me and I try to engage in a bit of casual locker-room banter like "I am attracted to women with high volumes of visible muscle. I find it powerfully arousing. Do you?". Motherfucker totally blanks me.
But I think that we kind of owe it to our communities to keep talking about it like this. Having these conversations in public is the only way to normalise it.
Im pretty sure the main reason why guys want to hide their attraction to specifically muscular women (as opposed to just any attractive woman that is not your girlfriend/wife) is simple and obvious: "People think muscular women look like men therefore people will think Im Gay". Whether thats a real problem or a realistic fear is another question.
This.
Another reason nobody has mentioned is that by stating you like women who are muscular you're making any woman who isn't feel self conscious if they like you. I've ran across this with several women I've dated in the past where they might be fit but not buff and when I make my attraction clear they react by thinking I dont find THEM attractive. I am bisexual so the gay aspect for me is a non issue other than feeling people's judgements, but making my S.O. feel unattractive to their partner is a quick way to tank what was a passionate fun attraction. I find a lot of body types fuckable, but buff women will always have my heart and hardness.
The ironic thing is the one time I was able to have a fling with a FBB and we broke it off she SWORE it was because of her age (46) and mine (25), even though it was because I was a broke ass who worked in retail and was maxing credit cards on the sly to show her a good time when we could get together and hook up.
My TL;DR women are self conscious and telling them you like a body type that they aren't will inevitably hurt the physical side of the relationship, possibly only short term
Another issue that should be highlighted and that hasn't been raised here yet: have you ever stopped to think that, for some members, the aspect of "secrecy" is part of the fetish?
Another issue that should be highlighted and that hasn't been raised here yet: have you ever stopped to think that, for some members, the aspect of "secrecy" is part of the fetish?
The "secret" part only becomes an isssue if a person wants to date an athletic/muscular woman and prefers this body type for a life partner. Then we get in to a problematic mismatch between lived behavior and future hopes and dreams. Not a great situation.
The why is simple. Life is easier when your friends and family don't know that you're attracted to masculine looking women (according to them anyway and in some cases it's hard to argue). You can say get new friends, but it's not worth dropping important people from your life over a fetish.
Kudos to those who don't have to keep it a secret, but it's not that simple for everyone else.
Theres a difference between telling someone in your life "Yeah im into fit women" or "I think a little muscle is sexy" vs saying "I want a 200lb 10% body fat monster to call mommy and to lick her abs while she flexes. Theres levels to this shit. Some of it never needs to see the light of day.
My attraction to buff women is a sexual preference, and usually I don't roam around telling others about my sexual preferences. It may not be a dark secret but is my privacy. Why do you feel the need to talk about your fetish to strangers? You literally started to talk about fbbs to a guy under the shower, and you wonder why he blanked you?!
Awhile ago, I ran across a post that had this bit of text on his significant other finding out he goes on GWM, and I inspired me to write this post:
Which leads me to ask: why? And this person isn't the only one to have written something like this. Why do so many people (here and outside of the forum) treat their interest in buff women like some dark secret? It's a preference, just like anything else when it comes to attraction. And when you look into the broader kink/fetish world, liking buff women is so very vanilla and unremarkable compared to some of the things I have seen people into.
Also, I have said this before but it bears repeating: People (strangers) care a lot less about you than you think. Even if you wore a shirt in a tourist area that says "I dig women built like Anastasia Korableva!," and on the shirt there is a picture of her in a bikini, I guarantee you that they might take a brief glance and right after go about their day. And if your friends give you grief or make fun of you (outside of friendly ribbing,) then they're not really your friends.
If anything, the insecurity of liking buff women and the desire to keep it secret is a lot more glaring and obvious than actually being into muscular women. No, you shouldn't shoehorn your love for buff women and other fetishes related to it when hanging out with your friends or whatever, but also don't go out of your way to keep it a buried secret.
And finally, look at all the dudes (and women!) who are dating and in relationships with a muscular women. Do any of them look embarrassed or sheepish to be with a buff partner? They ALL look proud and happy.
Seriously. If you are keeping this such a deep secret, ask yourself why. From a muscular woman fan to another, please don't be insecure about that.