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Why do women ask to be removed from this site?

Feb 16, 2021 - permalink

How long have you been into female bodybuilder's and do you interact with them?

Long time, I do interact with them at the gym.

Feb 16, 2021 - edited Feb 16, 2021 - permalink

> I don't think most users here are worse, than the typical instagram brodude calling "muscly women manly"

Comments like "omg I want her to crush me," "boing!" and the like are just as bad as dudes who call muscular women manly, and at times even worse. Reading some of the comments on ladies' pictures on the site, it's honestly not surprising that some of them don't want to be on here. At least on their social media pages, they can exercise some control on the comments they get.

I know it's kind of a schmoe stereotype that schmoes are socially awkward and that they don’t know how to talk to women, but to an extent it's somewhat true. I am involved in the crossfit community, and female athletes who are friends of mine show me some of the messages they get from men, and it's downright appalling. And when these dudes get called out on it, they'll almost always say things like "oh, most men are grossed out by buff women so you should be grateful I'm giving you attention." There's an entitlement among these men where they think they are special because they are attracted to a "non-conventional" look, when in reality there are more men who like muscular women than they realize.

It sucks when a favorite woman of ours asks not to be featured on the site, but we should also respect their wishes, and hopefully, for those who leave those gross comments, they can take a moment of self-reflection.

That is a little deep. There are not too many women checking this site to see what people are saying about them. They get these comments through e-mail and social media to a fairly large extent. The younger and newer to the scene girls may care, but even they are used to the comments. I did find that most big name fbbs were not fans of schmoes. I was complimented by a few for not "looking" like most. She meant the look and the clothing....anyhow...a few will open up to you while others are shy. I don't think most give a rat's tail about what we think here or comments. There is some of that, but a low number. They don't want to show up in every search engine and this place shows up big time. That may be more of a concern than anything else....relatives or friends seeing the comments or finding the site.

I've been around this a long long time and met many of the best. They are not fans of fans. There are exceptions. If they set their media to private, then why would they want their pics here? A few have that and the pics go here, but not most. Kaitlyn went private, but has many of her original followers still accepted. She wanted to weed out those asking about wrestling every day. She didn't get that part at first..until it happened a bunch.

Feb 16, 2021 - permalink

Many FBB'ers don't like men who don't work out at all.

This is very true. Women who put a premium on their physique/physical appearance are attracted to men (if they're into men) who do the same.

As for why women asked to be removed - creeps and autistic dingbats who won't stop pestering them probably has a lot to do with it.

Feb 16, 2021 - permalink

If randoms online are posting content behind a paywall, I totally understand why they would want their stuff taken down. But what I cant understand is, for example Aleesha Young, who makes her money through Onlyfans, her personal website and others. Now if someone post a paywall image, just have it deleted. But everything? Especially for the women that have paywalls, this site is basically FREE advertising for them, which would only drive traffic to their paywall sites.

Feb 16, 2021 - permalink

In extreme cases, Those accounts set it private can remove followers one by one to cut off access her posts.

Feb 19, 2021 - permalink

Long time, I do interact with them at the gym.

Okay. I asked, because from my experience, with the exception of weight training, heterosexual female bodybuilder's are like any other women. If they're attracted to a guy, regardless of if he works out or not, they will date him. Stability and security is far more valuable to women than a workout partner. In fact, most female bodybuilder's are not married to or date muscular men or competitors. Women like Tina Chandler, Ariel Gail, Alina Popa, Lenda Murray, Vladislava Galagan, Cindy Phillips, Britt Miller, Michi Ritz, Manda Costa, Mimi "Bonny" Nguyen, Kashma Maharaj, Candy Canary, Sherry Smith, Valentina Chepiga, Dina Al-Sabah, Nursel Gurler, Grace Rivera, Collette Nelson, Kaitlyn Vera and so many others have been with or are still in relationships with non-muscular men or men who don't work out. Granted some of them have dated muscular men or men who workout, but in the long run, they settled for average men.

To be frank, most men on this planet are not attracted to muscular women, so the dating pool is small for female bodybuilder's. Also, the bodybuilding industry has a large gay community who are also the industries largest supporters. Not only does the industry in general have straight males who find muscular women unattractive or have no interest in dating them, there are also gay males (enthusiasts and competitors) who have zero interest in women. Again, the dating pool is small for FBB's. Female bodybuilder's are in contact with more average men then they are with muscular men or bodybuilder's. Not to mention, a lot of female bodybuilder's are not into mass-muscle bodybuilder's. I remember seeing, Jaime Koeppe, on a dating show many years ago reject a male bodybuilder for a taller skinnier guy. She said she wasn't attracted to bodybuilders and preferred the skinnier guy, who she started hugging.

From sessions, to fans at events, IG, FB, and even GWM, you'll find more regular men interacting with these women than men who workout or workout as intensely as they do. Most female bodybuilder's or competitor's (BB, fitness, physique, figure etc.) don't even train with a significant other. They typically train alone or with a female or a male partner who may be a fellow competitor.

In truth, some female bodybuilder's, especially more experienced ones or vets, have a rule against dating overly muscular men or male competitors, because the lifestyle is one of vanity, narcissism, and self-serving. Hence, why flings are a thing in the industry and not so much long-term relationships. A female bodybuilder wanting men who works out is a want, sometimes a fantasy, if it's a sexual desire to hook up with a bodybuilder, or a desperate need for a connection (drugs, network etc.), and not realistic.

Some of the wealthiest and even most celebrated men in the world don't workout and in the presence of women, FBB or not, women will go out of their way for their attention. An average man who's stable can easily attract a female bodybuilder if he's not socially awkward. It's no secret that male bodybuilder's have been synonymous with being socially awkward. Nightclubs are a good example of how awkward they can be, especially when they're huddle around each other with their shirts off, while regular guys are dancing and talking to women. That was a common sight in NYC nightclubs for decades. Put an average man with personality in a room with a male bodybuilder or workout fanatic and a group of muscular women, the man with personality will always get the most attention.

I'm absolutely positive that there are hundreds of men on this site who don't workout and have dated, have been married to or are married to FBB's.

Feb 19, 2021 - permalink

Just finished reading Unicron's post, and there's a lot I want to respond to:

To be frank, most men on this planet are not attracted to muscular women, so the dating pool is small for female bodybuilder's. Also, the bodybuilding industry has a large gay community who are also the industries largest supporters. Not only does the industry in general have straight males who find muscular women unattractive or have no interest in dating them, there are also gay males (enthusiasts and competitors) who have zero interest in women. Again, the dating pool is small for FBB's. Female bodybuilder's are in contact with more average men then they are with muscular men or bodybuilder's. Not to mention, a lot of female bodybuilder's are not into mass-muscle bodybuilder's. I remember seeing, Jaime Koeppe, on a dating show many years ago reject a male bodybuilder for a taller skinnier guy. She said she wasn't attracted to bodybuilders and preferred the skinnier guy, who she started hugging.

I highly disagree with this, based on my experience interacting with muscular women and bodybuilders (there is no apostrophe for non-possessive nouns) online and in person as a Crossfitter. It is true that there are fewer men who are attracted to buff woman than men who like skinny, petite women, but don't conflate that as evidence that not many men are attracted to muscle. The truth is that muscular women have no shortage of male attention, as evidenced by how many men follow female strength athletes, how many subscribers buff women have on their onlyfans or other fetish pages, and overall how much attention they get. If I may make a bold statement, I think there are quite a few schmoes out there who inflate their sense of importance because they believe that very few men are attracted to women with muscle, therefore muscular woman should be grateful for the attention they give, when in reality there are more men who find muscle attractive than they realize. Also, while there are fewer muscular men than average, female bodybuilders and strength athletes are around male bodybuilders and strength athletes all the time, whether it's at the gym, at competitions or at expos and conventions. While there are more female lifters than ever before, men still make up the majority of the weight room, and there are far more muscular men than women.

From sessions, to fans at events, IG, FB, and even GWM, you'll find more regular men interacting with these women than men who workout or workout as intensely as they do. Most female bodybuilder's or competitor's (BB, fitness, physique, figure etc.) don't even train with a significant other. They typically train alone or with a female or a male partner who may be a fellow competitor.

This sounds like confirmation bias. I've been to conventions like the Olympia Expo and the Arnold, and while there are "regular" men there, there are also a LOT of fit men hanging around the women. And while you are correct that a lot of female bodybuilders/athletes don't necessarily train with their partners, they usually also have fit partners, either in the same sport or in some other athletic discipline (one of my Crossfit coach's husband, while not a crossfitter, is an MMA fighter.)

Some of the wealthiest and even most celebrated men in the world don't workout and in the presence of women, FBB or not, women will go out of their way for their attention. An average man who's stable can easily attract a female bodybuilder if he's not socially awkward. It's no secret that male bodybuilder's have been synonymous with being socially awkward. Nightclubs are a good example of how awkward they can be, especially when they're huddle around each other with their shirts off, while regular guys are dancing and talking to women. That was a common sight in NYC nightclubs for decades. Put an average man with personality in a room with a male bodybuilder or workout fanatic and a group of muscular women, the man with personality will always get the most attention.

You act like being a muscular guy is synonymous with being awkward and is exclusive from "having a personality." This strikes me as a kind of bitter perspective, along with the jab that "bodybuilders at the club are huddled together shirtless and awkward as compared to the average men who are dancing and interacting with the ladies." Narcissism and bodybuilding are not things that go hand in hand: there are plenty of out of shape men who are also narcissistic, and there are plenty of muscular men who are stable, kind, have good personalities and are sociable. Why can't a male bodybuilder not have a good personality? Also, I have quite a few female friends who are into bodybuilder, powerlifting, crossfit, olympic lifting and so on, and they tell me that they have a lot of unpleasant interactions from very socially awkward schmoes. Trying to equate male bodybuilders as "narcissistic and awkward" and non-muscular men as "good personalities, stable," is a very toxic perspective.

I'm absolutely positive that there are hundreds of men on this site who don't workout and have dated, have been married to or are married to FBB's.

I highly doubt that. While I'm sure there are some men here on the site who have dated or are currently in a relationship with a muscular woman, the majority are probably not, and of the ones who do, they probably are also engaged in some kind of fitness activity. They may not be into bodybuilding or strength training to the extent of their partner, but they do keep fit.

Feb 19, 2021 - permalink

I highly disagree with this, based on my experience interacting with muscular women and bodybuilders (there is no apostrophe for non-possessive nouns) online and in person as a Crossfitter. It is true that there are fewer men who are attracted to buff woman than men who like skinny, petite women, but don't conflate that as evidence that not many men are attracted to muscle. The truth is that muscular women have no shortage of male attention, as evidenced by how many men follow female strength athletes, how many subscribers buff women have on their onlyfans or other fetish pages, and overall how much attention they get. If I may make a bold statement, I think there are quite a few schmoes out there who inflate their sense of importance because they believe that very few men are attracted to women with muscle, therefore muscular woman should be grateful for the attention they give, when in reality there are more men who find muscle attractive than they realize.

What did I "Conflate as evidence"? You stated, "It is true that there are fewer men who are attracted to buff woman than men who like skinny, petite women". You did say, "Fewer", right? That puts them in the minority of the dating pool. Fact or fiction? It's not new to me that a lot of men (closeted) like muscular women. Nonetheless, a lot will not admit it, which is why some men who admire muscular women don't feel comfortable publicly expressing their appreciation for them. Public admiration or appreciation is different from online (behind a screen) admiration or appreciation. A significant difference. Many of friends will not admit it, but they sometimes show subtle signs of admiration or make references towards fit looking women.

Subscribers of buff women, onlyfans or fetish pages, are not who muscular women aspire to date. It's a business. More attention leads to a potentially larger cliental. The "Schmoes" that you speak of, giving a lot of these women attention are not necessarily "Schmoes", but "Simps". Simps do this with any woman who's attractive or appeals to them (Jade Cargill, Lacey Evans, Gina Carano, Massy Arias, Heba and Ruba Ali, Nicole Scherzinger, Rhianna etc.). You'll find some of the same men on many of these women's pages, going back and forth. That behavior is not exclusive to muscular women. Women get attention because men and other women give it to them and "Simps" give it the most.

Also, while there are fewer muscular men than average, female bodybuilders and strength athletes are around male bodybuilders and strength athletes all the time, whether it's at the gym, at competitions or at expos and conventions. While there are more female lifters than ever before, men still make up the majority of the weight room, and there are far more muscular men than women.

Very true. Now, how many of them are dating each apart from the promiscuous gym chick that's slept with multiple men? My experience may vary from yours since this is common in a lot of NYC gyms. A few of my neighbors are some of the promiscuous gym girls I speak of. While they look good, most of the guys on the block know their reputation in and outside of the gym.

This sounds like confirmation bias. I've been to conventions like the Olympia Expo and the Arnold, and while there are "regular" men there, there are also a LOT of fit men hanging around the women. And while you are correct that a lot of female bodybuilders/athletes don't necessarily train with their partners, they usually also have fit partners, either in the same sport or in some other athletic discipline (one of my Crossfit coach's husband, while not a crossfitter, is an MMA fighter.)

While "female bodybuilders/athletes...Usually...have fit partners", they also are attracted to non-fit men. Right or wrong? It was stated by COD8MW that "Many FBB'ers don't like men who don't work out at all", and that's not true. Women are not female bodybuilder's or workout enthusiasts from their adolescence to an elderly age, especially not female bodybuilders or crossfitters. Before a female bodybuilder even transitions into intense weight training, she's your average female. After years of weight training or competition (retirement, life changes etc.) she's back to being a normal woman with possibly no signs of ever being a muscular woman. Do you think a woman that's made such a transition still not "like men who don't work out..."?

You act like being a muscular guy is synonymous with being awkward and is exclusive from "having a personality." This strikes me as a kind of bitter perspective, along with the jab that "bodybuilders at the club are huddled together shirtless and awkward as compared to the average men who are dancing and interacting with the ladies." Narcissism and bodybuilding are not things that go hand in hand: there are plenty of out of shape men who are also narcissistic, and there are plenty of muscular men who are stable, kind, have good personalities and are sociable. Why can't a male bodybuilder not have a good personality?

My introduction to bodybuilding (Lee Haney victory on T.V. and older friends) and weight training was around 1988 or '89 (wasn't even a teen yet). I got into the sport through magazines in 1992 (Thanks to Cory Everson). While knowing a lot of friends and peers who were bodybuilders or muscular at some point, very few were the center of attention or the life of a party. For the most part, they began lifting weights to make up for what they lacked with women. They didn't care about health. It was gear, beaches in the summer, and parties. If a person has a personality and trains, it can enhance their character for good or for worse whether they're on gear (which can take it to the net level) or not. If a person lacks personality, that's a personal issue.

A "Jab"? Hardly. I train. Some of my friends train. I'm speaking from personal experience growing up and living in a big crazy city all my life. Are you offended by my reality? Anyone from NY state in their late 30's, 40's or older who's gone out to some of the biggest parties in the 90's and early 2000's at clubs like LimeLight, Pacha, The Tunnel, Sound Factory, Twilo/Vinyl/Avalon and so forth will say the same. It's not an underground subculture or lifestyle. This was common. The show Jersey Shore (mostly NY cast) showcased the crowd I'm speaking of e.g. gelled hair, no shirt, muscles, and dancing with each other in groups. I dare someone who's experienced this, especially from the tri-state area, say otherwise. I double dare them! LOL

What are bodybuilders judged by on and off the stage, personality or appearance?

So, "Narcissism and bodybuilding are not things that go hand in hand"? Narcissism: "Displaying or marked by excessive concern with one's own physical appearance." (Merriam-Webster) Which part of this definition is not associated with bodybuilding? Google "narcissism bodybuilding" and let me know if you still believe "Narcissism and bodybuilding are not things that go hand in hand".

Also, I have quite a few female friends who are into bodybuilder, powerlifting, crossfit, olympic lifting and so on, and they tell me that they have a lot of unpleasant interactions from very socially awkward schmoes. Trying to equate male bodybuilders as "narcissistic and awkward" and non-muscular men as "good personalities, stable," is a very toxic perspective.

I'm not referring to "Schmoes" nor did I mention them in my last post. I'm talking about the average or "regular" male that doesn't live a bodybuilding lifestyle or trains as excessively as competitive female bodybuilders do or work out in general. Most men on this planet do not work out. You're arguing that what I'm saying is false.

If you don't mind me asking, what generation are you (age is necessary) and where do you reside? Obviously, your experience is completely different from mine.

Where did I say "non-muscular men as 'good personalities, stable'"? I said, "An average man who's stable can easily attract a female bodybuilder if he's not socially awkward. It's no secret that male bodybuilder's have been synonymous with being socially awkward." So, you're saying this is a lie? An average sociable male who is stable can't attract a woman and male bodybuilder's have never been synonymous with being socially awkward?

I highly doubt that. While I'm sure there are some men here on the site who have dated or are currently in a relationship with a muscular woman, the majority are probably not, and of the ones who do, they probably are also engaged in some kind of fitness activity. They may not be into bodybuilding or strength training to the extent of their partner, but they do keep fit.

GWM has "50,915" users and counting. I said hundreds (that's less than 1,000 and 2% of 50,915) of men and or women, not "The majority".

Feb 20, 2021 - permalink

I'm trying to figure out what the disagreement is here...

[deleted]
Feb 21, 2021 - permalink

I've seen on Instagram that when the male admirers come out of the woodwork, they have absolutely no social skills whatever. They immediately bombard the girl/woman out of the blue and start asking them to satisfy whatever particular fetish they have.

"Lift and carry your friends!" "Arm wrestle your friends!" "Do a stomach vacuum!" "Flex your lats for me!"

Seriously, these guys think these women have no life other than to perform on command for muscle fetishists. After a couple of months of that, I'd probably leave, too, at least if no one was paying me.

Feb 21, 2021 - permalink

Those guys are likely less educated.

Feb 21, 2021 - permalink

I'm glad to see we're back to the topic...

I'd just like to point out that the commentary received by the ladies who actually interact with us here is generally less pervy.

Case in point, Kristfigure. I don't think I've ever seen anyone disrespect her because we all know she's reading our posts. We don't want to do anything to discourage her from sharing, so we're all on our best behavior.

I mean, I know I've occasionally crossed the line and I should think twice before hitting "post comment"

Just some thoughts...

Feb 21, 2021 - permalink

Okay. I asked, because from my experience, with the exception of weight training, heterosexual female bodybuilder's are like any other women. If they're attracted to a guy, regardless of if he works out or not, they will date him. Stability and security is far more valuable to women than a workout partner. In fact, most female bodybuilder's are not married to or date muscular men or competitors. Women like Tina Chandler, Ariel Gail, Alina Popa, Lenda Murray, Vladislava Galagan, Cindy Phillips, Britt Miller, Michi Ritz, Manda Costa, Mimi "Bonny" Nguyen, Kashma Maharaj, Candy Canary, Sherry Smith, Valentina Chepiga, Dina Al-Sabah, Nursel Gurler, Grace Rivera, Collette Nelson, Kaitlyn Vera and so many others have been with or are still in relationships with non-muscular men or men who don't work out. Granted some of them have dated muscular men or men who workout, but in the long run, they settled for average men.

Females overwhelmingly prefer men who are bigger and stronger than they are themselves. Exceptions are notable in part because they're rare. While you will find 6'3" women who date men shorter than themselves, it's due in part to settling/options (the market for taller males is extremely small and competitive). Also, despite eschewing weights, non-muscular men are nevertheless capable of being bigger and stronger than their hardbody wives and girlfriends.

Feb 22, 2021 - permalink

... and we're right back to off-topic...

Chainer
Feb 22, 2021 - permalink

Sometimes I might enforce that a thread stay on topic, especially toward the start of a thread. In this case the actual subject of the thread has been beaten into the ground, especially given that removal requests are not as frequent or significant as some in this thread seem to believe (which I think I mentioned upthread).

Feb 22, 2021 - permalink

My apologies, Chainer. I hadn't meant to get moderation involved. I would have used the report button if I thought it was worthy of your time.

I still think it's neat when the ladies interact with the audience and think their presence has a positive effect on the level of discourse hereabouts.

Of course, there will always be pervs and trolls...

Thanks for your efforts. Keeping a lid on this place has to be a lot of work and I've seen how fast things can degenerate from "socially awkward comments" to profane vulgarity and disturbing infatuation...

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